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Mindful Relationships – Nerdful Mind #39

October 11, 2020 by Simon Mannes

What relationships do you have in life?

And which are the important ones? Your colleagues, friends, parents, siblings, partner, or kids are all part of your life.

The relationship that arguably influences our lives the most is the one with our partner.

Learn to be happy by yourself, then find someone who shares your values and who you can grow with.

Embody the qualities you want your partner to have. Be curious, kind, compassionate, respectful, accepting, trustful, and loving. If you learn to not only show these qualities, but feel them towards your partner and yourself, you are on your way to a happy life.

Go on your own journey first, then find someone you like who walks in the same direction.

Reading Recommendations

Not Busy, Focused | The Minimalists

“Take a look around: everyone is multitasking. We’re doing more than we’ve ever done, attempting to fill every interstitial zone with more work. Every downtown scene is the same: heads tilted downward, faces lost in glowing screens, technology turning people into zombies.”

Do Relationships Make Us Healthier and Happier? | Psychology Today

“Satisfying relationships not only make us happy, they also influence our health as much as getting enough sleep, eating healthy, or not smoking. But what about toxic relationships?”

The Iceberg Secret, Revealed – Joel on Software

“If there’s one thing every junior consultant needs to have injected into their head with a heavy duty 2500 RPM DeWalt Drill, it’s this: Customers Don’t Know What They Want. Stop Expecting Customers to Know What They Want. It’s just never going to happen. Get over it.”

Weekly Mindfulness Practice

Try out a three-step self-compassion break. Think of a situation in your life that is causing you stress or pain. How does thinking of this situation make you feel?

Then say to yourself:

  1. “This is a moment of suffering” – Or “This is stress.”
  2. “Suffering is part of life. I'm not alone.” – Put your hands over your heart, feel your breath and the warmth of your hands.
  3. “May I be kind to myself” – Which kind words can you say to yourself right now? Say what you need to hear, e.g. “may I be kind to myself” or “may I be patient”.

Thanks to self-compassion.org

End Note

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Have a great week

Simon

PS: If you found an article you think others might like, and that fits this newsletter, I’d love it if you write me an email. Just reply!